I sat down to write this article during my five-week hiatus from practicing law, while travelling in South America. Prior to my travels, I was feeling uninspired. I didn’t feel the passion I usually felt when a new client came through the door. I wasn’t excited about the challenge of a new research assignment. I tuned into an employment law case before the Court of Appeal on a potentially law changing issue, but caught myself instead staring at the clock waiting for the appearance to conclude.
My indifference to the practice arose from a variety of practices that I think many of us unfortunately pick up in the legal profession. Despite preaching this to others, I did not set boundaries for myself. I did not talk to my colleagues about feeling overwhelmed. If I felt stressed about work, I worked more under the false pretenses that it would alleviate my stress. I was on the way to burning out, but that’s a story for another day. Instead, I want to focus on the refresh that my time off has given me.
It is rare for a lawyer to have the time to completely disconnect from the profession. I had no files or deadlines looming over me. I could turn off the constant worrying going on in my brain and be completely present in the moment. Surprisingly, however, I began to miss the practice of law.
For anyone feeling like I was, uninspired, on the verge of burning out, or questioning why they entered the profession in the first place, I’ve tried to summarize my reflections in three main points below. Although we cannot all take five-week breaks, hopefully some of these points speak to you and your practice.
- I Miss Helping Others
I had individuals reach out while I was off to assist them with time-sensitive, employment-related matters. While I could give them legal “information”, my hands were otherwise tied. I could not advise or represent them while I was not working.
I got into law to make it more accessible. I love being able to explain the law to individuals in an easily digestible way and to lay out their options in light of that law. I couldn’t provide that advice if I wasn’t practicing the law.
- I Miss My Colleagues
I missed discussing (and commiserating) with my colleagues about anything and everything law related: deadlines, difficult opposing counsel, first time court appearances, the list goes on and on. I missed going for a quick coffee break or walk. I missed collaborating on a file and talking through complex legal issues.
I mentioned this in another OBA article – our colleagues just “get us” more than anyone outside our profession has or ever will. I missed those relationships.
- I Miss the Challenge
The legal profession is very humbling. We will never know everything, and we are constantly learning. There is, however, something so rewarding about succeeding in each new challenge the law brings our way. We can conduct research and write opinions on the likelihood of success in legal matters entirely new to us. We can find that perfect Ontario Court of Appeal case to support our argument. We can effectively prepare for a motion on a short timeline.
My time away from the law was an absolute privilege. It gave me the opportunity to rest and recharge, and realize that I still have a lot of passion for this profession. I recognize, however, that very few lawyers will have this lengthy period of time off during their careers. If you are feeling disinterested, indifferent, or unsure of whether your passion for the law will ever return, I hope some of these points hit home and can help renew your passion for the law as well.
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