In my third trimester of my pregnancy, I had an epiphany that I would not be “lawyering” for over a year. This was difficult to even imagine, as my identity as a lawyer has been engrained into my personality for the last 6 years. I truly feared that taking a year off would make me feel lost. I even thought, well maybe I can work part-time for the first few months since all they do is sleep (I found out later how wrong this statement is). My colleagues discouraged me from doing this and encouraged me to take the time off with my daughter.
After my daughter was born, I found it very difficult to disconnect from my work. I constantly called my colleagues, requested updates on the files that I worked on, would ask them if they needed any help or wanted to discuss strategy. My colleagues were very kind to my requests but continually reminded me that I need to embrace this precious time with my daughter and truly disconnect from work. Disconnecting from work is something that I have consistently struggled with. So, this was not an easy task for me.
At this point, I decided to approach this new chapter in my life as the new role of a lifetime. I was going to be in-house counsel to one extremely demanding client. This client needs a lot of hand-holding and direction, does not always listen to my instructions, and often makes messes that I need to clean up.
I quickly realized that despite being on parental leave, I was able to constantly sharpen my legal skills. I have enhanced my negotiation skills and improved my problem-solving skills.
Reflecting on my parental leave, I wouldn’t change taking the time to stay with my daughter. The days were sometimes long, but the year was very short. This time forced me to disconnect from work, which is something I needed to learn to do. I also appreciated that I was not going to lose my legal skills, if anything I made intentional efforts to improve them. I remained active with OBA, chaired CPD events, connected with my colleagues on a monthly basis, read legal articles or new cases and learned new areas of law.
I truly feel that my one-year secondment has made me a better person, better mother, and a better lawyer.
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